Resisting Activitism
Living in busy Singapore makes us feel like busyness is a badge of usefulness and even spirituality. Busy pastors are normal in many places. Busy in meetings, projects, teaching, strategising, etc. Meaningful busyness as some would say it.
But Eugene Peterson pulled no punches when he stated that "busyness is a sin!".
Busyness, through good church activities, can rob us of worship.
We can be so busy serving Him and missed relating to Him.
We can be so busy doing church and missed recognising His call.
We can be so busy solving problems and missed relying on His Spirit.
We need to stamp the tide of cultural influence and re-evaluate how we live our lives.
We need to question our need to be busy.
We need to ask soul searching questions on “where is God in our work”.
(if our work is to be truly our act of worship, God must be central and key!)
We need to make time to reflect or we will only be pushed to do what we have been scheduled to do.
Pauses in the day, breaks in the week, retreats in a year are all essential space of time we owe to God and ourselves to live life intentionally for worship.
Otherwise, we could complete our time on earth and realise that we have worshipped the church more than Christ!
pastoral musing
Learning on submission and its related issues
1 Definition of submission – voluntary obedience in love
2 Control – good or bad? denial of rights or pay for the consequence?
3 Discipline – is more than punishment. It is training for maturity
4 Can a husband expect submission? Yes but not good; God loves us but did not control us into submission. Submission is our choice. Choice brings consequences.
5 Failure to submit will bring forth the consequence and the person involved must be prepared for it. Blaming the consequence is not being conscious that it is a direct result of his choice.
6 Can a leader “control” the behaviour of his members by setting the boundary of freedom? Beyond which there will be “disciplinary” action?
7 The key issue is in the spirit of the so called “control” and “accountability”. If the spirit is punitive, the effects on people is more than the intention of building but tearing. Shepherd needs to be mindful of our representation of God to followers. God disciplines us when we choose not to submit to His word and will. But His love for us is not dependent on our obedience or submission; our ability to recognise or be deceived is clouded by our sin. Yet Grace is there to bring us back. God’s way is prompting us, lovingly, to obedience and not controlled obedience, dictated obedience. Key is really in the posture.
8 On the side of the leader
- be mindful how we implement the teaching of “submission” and “accountability”. It is not how but what is the spirit within us when we do so.
- allow grace to guide our posture in dealing with our followers
9 On the side of the followers
- listen to contrary advice with a teachable heart; ask ourselves why we are not open to this advice
- test our own spirit ie are we being rebellious
- consult godly advice
- be willing to submit, not just to man, to Godly advice.
- be prepared to humble all the way including facing the consequence of your choice.
10 I am still musing on this subject…hahaha….
1 Definition of submission – voluntary obedience in love
2 Control – good or bad? denial of rights or pay for the consequence?
3 Discipline – is more than punishment. It is training for maturity
4 Can a husband expect submission? Yes but not good; God loves us but did not control us into submission. Submission is our choice. Choice brings consequences.
5 Failure to submit will bring forth the consequence and the person involved must be prepared for it. Blaming the consequence is not being conscious that it is a direct result of his choice.
6 Can a leader “control” the behaviour of his members by setting the boundary of freedom? Beyond which there will be “disciplinary” action?
7 The key issue is in the spirit of the so called “control” and “accountability”. If the spirit is punitive, the effects on people is more than the intention of building but tearing. Shepherd needs to be mindful of our representation of God to followers. God disciplines us when we choose not to submit to His word and will. But His love for us is not dependent on our obedience or submission; our ability to recognise or be deceived is clouded by our sin. Yet Grace is there to bring us back. God’s way is prompting us, lovingly, to obedience and not controlled obedience, dictated obedience. Key is really in the posture.
8 On the side of the leader
- be mindful how we implement the teaching of “submission” and “accountability”. It is not how but what is the spirit within us when we do so.
- allow grace to guide our posture in dealing with our followers
9 On the side of the followers
- listen to contrary advice with a teachable heart; ask ourselves why we are not open to this advice
- test our own spirit ie are we being rebellious
- consult godly advice
- be willing to submit, not just to man, to Godly advice.
- be prepared to humble all the way including facing the consequence of your choice.
10 I am still musing on this subject…hahaha….
Personal update
Attended church at Trinity.
It was a nice feeling because I was from Trinity back in the 80s. I remembered attending church at World Trade Centre and prayer meeting at Adam Road. I went to church alone for more than a year without knowing anyone there. But I felt God and His truth there for my learning.
Then my BS leader asked me to change to a more conservative church because of the charismatic issues. So I did. I went to Grace Baptist Church in 1985.
And it was not long when Lawrence Khong, then SP of GBC, was asked to leave. I followed the rest to FCBC in Aug 1986.
And now, visiting TCC, brought back much fond memories with God and the simple church life.
The message today was about the Prosperity God wants for us ie Your Adverity will be His opportunity, Your Confession will be His permission, Your emptiness will be His readiness.
It was a good reminder to thirst and hunger for His fullness in our lives.
I am glad to see this church growing well in members and ministry.
It was a nice feeling because I was from Trinity back in the 80s. I remembered attending church at World Trade Centre and prayer meeting at Adam Road. I went to church alone for more than a year without knowing anyone there. But I felt God and His truth there for my learning.
Then my BS leader asked me to change to a more conservative church because of the charismatic issues. So I did. I went to Grace Baptist Church in 1985.
And it was not long when Lawrence Khong, then SP of GBC, was asked to leave. I followed the rest to FCBC in Aug 1986.
And now, visiting TCC, brought back much fond memories with God and the simple church life.
The message today was about the Prosperity God wants for us ie Your Adverity will be His opportunity, Your Confession will be His permission, Your emptiness will be His readiness.
It was a good reminder to thirst and hunger for His fullness in our lives.
I am glad to see this church growing well in members and ministry.
Reflection on Leadership
Leadership Paradox
- The siren call of stardom (pp 37-50)
1 Philip Yancy
“We prefer a tall, handsome, and above all, slender Jesus."
2 Obedience and humility are God’s twin guardians against the plague of vain ambition resident within the heart of the leader who wants to be a star.
3 Unholy trinity of Amercia’s definition of success; size, speed and public exposure.
4 In our anxious desire to validate the fruit of our ministry, we give in to these definitions.
5 Lewis Lapham, essayist and editor of Harper’s Magazine, wrote in the 60’s:
“The previous distinct genres of journalism, literature, and theatre gradually fused into something known as media. The amalgam of forms resulted in a national theatre of celebrity….it the media succeed with their spectacles and grand simplifications, it is because their audiences define happiness as the state of being well and artfully deceived.
6 The line of separation between truth and fantasy vanishes into something called “testimony” or “vision”.
7 People want to have larger than life heros and these exaggerated claims are rationalised on the grounds that the end justifies the means.
8 Doorway of opportunity can quickly become trap doors for the leader driven to promote his ministry.
9 The enticement of success and popularity can easily deluded a leader into believing the fallacy that opportunity and guidance are synonymous.
10 Walter Wangerin, Jr
“From the beginning of His ministry, Jesus charged those who experienced His power to say nothing about it”
11 Adolph Hitler
“The great masses of the people …will more easily fall victims to a big lie than a small one.”
12 Jesus was almost oblivious to ministry momentum….by his refusal to captialise on the situation and opportunities created.
Jn 8:29 –“…..i always do what pleases Him”. Jesus lived by putting His Father’s will above His own. He dwelt in that serene place where ego, prestige, and position had no dominion.
13 We must seek to order everything in accordance with His will, even if it means forfeiting wonderful opportunities to further enhance our leadership standing. We must have the courage and conviction to say no to a coveted opening even when knowing that by doing so another leader may take our place in reaping the rewards.
14 Why we reject servant leadership?
Nature of servant leadership goes deeply against the grain of human ego.
- we offer mere lip services to the possibility of pride while denying its insidious work in our hearts.
Concentration on an American-style ethos fuels us with a tainted incentive to look good at all cost.
- making promises and announce big plans that will never come about but we look and sound successful. When challenged on such issues, we wax eloquent on the nature and calling of visionary leadership while our followers clamour for more vision talk.
- in America, appearance count more than reality.
Obsession with packaging
- we want a formula or technique that we could market as the next big revelation to solve XXXX or growth, etc.
- we have accepted man-centered, self-glorified, ego-inflating packaging as a normal part of Christendom.
15 Frederick Buechner
“One of the blunders religious people are particularly fond of making is the attempt to be more spiritual than God.”
16 Trap on Destiny and Call
“One’s destiny can become one’s test…the individual driven to act out and prove that he or she is a special chosen vessel can easily forfeit the anointing to lead. The initial calling may well have been from God, but unchecked ego will pervert the call. Vain ambition disguises itself with assertions of uniqueness. Destiny bound with ego easily degenerates into empire building, and empire builders have the unfortunate tendency to become false prophets.”
“The leader wishing to emulate Jesus resists the great temptation to build a ministry around himself. He chooses to abandon himself to the will and pleasure of God….communion takes precedence over causes, obedience over opportunity.”
16 Brennan Manning
“The imposter does not want to come out of hiding. He will grab for the cosmetic kit and put on his pretty face to make himself “presentable”.”
17 The deceitful hearts; things to watch
- status with privileges
- name dropping reveals insecurity
- defensiveness
- self promotion
- using ends to justify means
This book is a Good Read. Many important lessons for us to comtemplate ...and we need to lest we are reflecting leadership of the world more than leadership of Jesus.
If you are a leader...which kind you would rather be?
- The siren call of stardom (pp 37-50)
1 Philip Yancy
“We prefer a tall, handsome, and above all, slender Jesus."
2 Obedience and humility are God’s twin guardians against the plague of vain ambition resident within the heart of the leader who wants to be a star.
3 Unholy trinity of Amercia’s definition of success; size, speed and public exposure.
4 In our anxious desire to validate the fruit of our ministry, we give in to these definitions.
5 Lewis Lapham, essayist and editor of Harper’s Magazine, wrote in the 60’s:
“The previous distinct genres of journalism, literature, and theatre gradually fused into something known as media. The amalgam of forms resulted in a national theatre of celebrity….it the media succeed with their spectacles and grand simplifications, it is because their audiences define happiness as the state of being well and artfully deceived.
6 The line of separation between truth and fantasy vanishes into something called “testimony” or “vision”.
7 People want to have larger than life heros and these exaggerated claims are rationalised on the grounds that the end justifies the means.
8 Doorway of opportunity can quickly become trap doors for the leader driven to promote his ministry.
9 The enticement of success and popularity can easily deluded a leader into believing the fallacy that opportunity and guidance are synonymous.
10 Walter Wangerin, Jr
“From the beginning of His ministry, Jesus charged those who experienced His power to say nothing about it”
11 Adolph Hitler
“The great masses of the people …will more easily fall victims to a big lie than a small one.”
12 Jesus was almost oblivious to ministry momentum….by his refusal to captialise on the situation and opportunities created.
Jn 8:29 –“…..i always do what pleases Him”. Jesus lived by putting His Father’s will above His own. He dwelt in that serene place where ego, prestige, and position had no dominion.
13 We must seek to order everything in accordance with His will, even if it means forfeiting wonderful opportunities to further enhance our leadership standing. We must have the courage and conviction to say no to a coveted opening even when knowing that by doing so another leader may take our place in reaping the rewards.
14 Why we reject servant leadership?
Nature of servant leadership goes deeply against the grain of human ego.
- we offer mere lip services to the possibility of pride while denying its insidious work in our hearts.
Concentration on an American-style ethos fuels us with a tainted incentive to look good at all cost.
- making promises and announce big plans that will never come about but we look and sound successful. When challenged on such issues, we wax eloquent on the nature and calling of visionary leadership while our followers clamour for more vision talk.
- in America, appearance count more than reality.
Obsession with packaging
- we want a formula or technique that we could market as the next big revelation to solve XXXX or growth, etc.
- we have accepted man-centered, self-glorified, ego-inflating packaging as a normal part of Christendom.
15 Frederick Buechner
“One of the blunders religious people are particularly fond of making is the attempt to be more spiritual than God.”
16 Trap on Destiny and Call
“One’s destiny can become one’s test…the individual driven to act out and prove that he or she is a special chosen vessel can easily forfeit the anointing to lead. The initial calling may well have been from God, but unchecked ego will pervert the call. Vain ambition disguises itself with assertions of uniqueness. Destiny bound with ego easily degenerates into empire building, and empire builders have the unfortunate tendency to become false prophets.”
“The leader wishing to emulate Jesus resists the great temptation to build a ministry around himself. He chooses to abandon himself to the will and pleasure of God….communion takes precedence over causes, obedience over opportunity.”
16 Brennan Manning
“The imposter does not want to come out of hiding. He will grab for the cosmetic kit and put on his pretty face to make himself “presentable”.”
17 The deceitful hearts; things to watch
- status with privileges
- name dropping reveals insecurity
- defensiveness
- self promotion
- using ends to justify means
This book is a Good Read. Many important lessons for us to comtemplate ...and we need to lest we are reflecting leadership of the world more than leadership of Jesus.
If you are a leader...which kind you would rather be?
Pastoral reflection on mentoring.
"Am I a good mentor?"
Someone asked this question during his visit to my place over the CNY. He was asking himself if he had been a good mentor to his boys.
What prompted him, to ask this question, was his dissatisfaction over some of the responses of his disciples.
My reflection over this question is as follow;
Expectation!
What has been the expected expectation from those he mentored?
Has this expectation been clearly defined and communicated?
Has a suitable culture and process been established to bring the expectation into reality? Or was it just an incidental approach to achieve an intentional goal?
Edmund Chan talked a lot about the certain kind of disciples. G12 spoke about G12 leaders; people who could multiple themselves 12x. Nav taught about 2 Tim 2:2.
Every one of the above did not stop at stating their end expectation. They developed a process and culture that would enhance their expectation to become a reality.
They commit EVERY resources within their disposal to ensure that the process and culture are properly established and refined over time.
Back to the question;
If there is no clear expectation, anything can also be considered as acceptable or otherwise.
If there is lack of commitment to the processes, than anything would be a bonus.
Some would raise the question about the lack of appropriate response from the disciples.
This could be resolved when we looked at Jesus and His experience. He had 4 categories of students ie core 3, group of 12, company of 72 and multitudes. And He had a Judas who betrayed Him, a Peter who denied Him, a Thomas who doubted Him, a team of 10 who left Him. By any count, Jesus would have been a failure in discipleship. But He was not. He came back to them, restored them and commissioned them afresh. Love never fails.
What does this mean for us today?
Identify who you have
Don’t expect the 72 to be as close as the 3.
Identify your present group where they are with you ie r they the core 3 or just
plain multitude?
Don’t be afraid to accept the fact that they are not your 3 nor 12.
Do give your best to raise the 3 and 12.
Challenge them to pursue their God given goals.
They must know God and God's dream in their lives
They must own their dream and pursue them.
Only when they own the dream, it will only be your doing in their lives.
The place of prayer and word life are very vital to their spirtual wellbeing; THERE IS NO SHORT CUT.
Accept their progress as your gift of worship to God.
Don’t lord over them.
Accept their progress, no matter how small, as your gift for God and not inflate ego.
Someone asked this question during his visit to my place over the CNY. He was asking himself if he had been a good mentor to his boys.
What prompted him, to ask this question, was his dissatisfaction over some of the responses of his disciples.
My reflection over this question is as follow;
Expectation!
What has been the expected expectation from those he mentored?
Has this expectation been clearly defined and communicated?
Has a suitable culture and process been established to bring the expectation into reality? Or was it just an incidental approach to achieve an intentional goal?
Edmund Chan talked a lot about the certain kind of disciples. G12 spoke about G12 leaders; people who could multiple themselves 12x. Nav taught about 2 Tim 2:2.
Every one of the above did not stop at stating their end expectation. They developed a process and culture that would enhance their expectation to become a reality.
They commit EVERY resources within their disposal to ensure that the process and culture are properly established and refined over time.
Back to the question;
If there is no clear expectation, anything can also be considered as acceptable or otherwise.
If there is lack of commitment to the processes, than anything would be a bonus.
Some would raise the question about the lack of appropriate response from the disciples.
This could be resolved when we looked at Jesus and His experience. He had 4 categories of students ie core 3, group of 12, company of 72 and multitudes. And He had a Judas who betrayed Him, a Peter who denied Him, a Thomas who doubted Him, a team of 10 who left Him. By any count, Jesus would have been a failure in discipleship. But He was not. He came back to them, restored them and commissioned them afresh. Love never fails.
What does this mean for us today?
Identify who you have
Don’t expect the 72 to be as close as the 3.
Identify your present group where they are with you ie r they the core 3 or just
plain multitude?
Don’t be afraid to accept the fact that they are not your 3 nor 12.
Do give your best to raise the 3 and 12.
Challenge them to pursue their God given goals.
They must know God and God's dream in their lives
They must own their dream and pursue them.
Only when they own the dream, it will only be your doing in their lives.
The place of prayer and word life are very vital to their spirtual wellbeing; THERE IS NO SHORT CUT.
Accept their progress as your gift of worship to God.
Don’t lord over them.
Accept their progress, no matter how small, as your gift for God and not inflate ego.
My thoughts on Leadership
i enjoyed reading a lot on leadership lately because of the course material i am doing. So i have attached a chapter for myself as well as all of you who wish to learn something new about leadership.
Leadership Paradox by Denny Gunderson
1 Servant – Diakonos; through the sand- The background to this word revolves the story of servant standing in the way of the sand storm to protect the master.
2 Whoever wants to be great among you must be your servant” (Matt20:26)
3 The test of our spiritual life is the power to descend…. – Oswald Chambers
4 The human obsession for control and the sincere desire of a true leader to serve are mutually exclusive.
5 The test of fading influence
- how did John the Baptist cope with his decreasing influence with the advent of the Messiah?
- is leadership a position or a role?
Formal leadership overly emphasised followership
Matt 20:25-26; ….not so with you
Jesus clearly and unequivocally denounces as worldly any talk or practice that establishes hierarchical orders?
(i understand the drift of the author on the hierarchical orders but i am not sure if i can fully endorse this position....still thinking...Jethro's advice to Moses was definitely a hierarchical structure. it was meant to make things more manageable for Moses. i tend to see that the verses in Matt 20 refers to the abuse of structure rather than attacking the structure.)
Jim Peterson …..
”Thus, in doing this, our church Fathers neatly and permanently divided
God’s people into two castes; laity and clergy. We have lived with this
caste system ever since, even though the bible teaches otherwise.”
Who do we spend the most time with? People in influence or People in need? Who would Jesus spend the most time with?
Charles Colson
“The pastor or Christian leader who is constantly the object of adoring
crowds soon cant live without it and often unconsciously, begins to shape
his message to assure continual adulation.”
When ministry (noun) takes priority over minister (verb), servanthood is squeezed out.
Ministry of God does not mean my ministry; I cannot lay claims to its effectiveness or lack of….It belongs to God ultimately..
My identity should not be wrapped around my position as a leader.
Embracing one’s own failure and expendability is a major step of liberation away from the bondage of self-interest.
M Scott Peck
“The need for control – to ensure the desired outcome – is at least
partially rooted in the fear of control.”
- A true servant leader
… relinquishment of a prized position, leaving the security of a solid financial “power base”, or
voluntarily minimising one’s own importance so that someone else can have an opportunity
to rise to a place of prominence.
With nothing to prove and no vested interest, take joy in seeing others grow beyond himself.
Henri Nouwen
– The beginning and the end of Christian leadership is to give your life for
other.
Jesus Christ
“The Son of Man did not come to be served but to serve and to give His life as a ransom for many” (Matt 20:28)
The goal of a leader is to work himself out of a job.
A commitment to planned obsolescence may produce inferior automobiles, but it makes for
great servant leaders.
- Questions to think
Are we willing to embrace God’s will even when His will appear to hold a deterioration of our personal place of importance as a leader?
Is our identity so wrapped up in our leadership position that the loss of position causes us deep emotional trauma?
Can we make John the Baptist’s choice to decrease?
Leadership Paradox by Denny Gunderson
1 Servant – Diakonos; through the sand- The background to this word revolves the story of servant standing in the way of the sand storm to protect the master.
2 Whoever wants to be great among you must be your servant” (Matt20:26)
3 The test of our spiritual life is the power to descend…. – Oswald Chambers
4 The human obsession for control and the sincere desire of a true leader to serve are mutually exclusive.
5 The test of fading influence
- how did John the Baptist cope with his decreasing influence with the advent of the Messiah?
- is leadership a position or a role?
Formal leadership overly emphasised followership
Matt 20:25-26; ….not so with you
Jesus clearly and unequivocally denounces as worldly any talk or practice that establishes hierarchical orders?
(i understand the drift of the author on the hierarchical orders but i am not sure if i can fully endorse this position....still thinking...Jethro's advice to Moses was definitely a hierarchical structure. it was meant to make things more manageable for Moses. i tend to see that the verses in Matt 20 refers to the abuse of structure rather than attacking the structure.)
Jim Peterson …..
”Thus, in doing this, our church Fathers neatly and permanently divided
God’s people into two castes; laity and clergy. We have lived with this
caste system ever since, even though the bible teaches otherwise.”
Who do we spend the most time with? People in influence or People in need? Who would Jesus spend the most time with?
Charles Colson
“The pastor or Christian leader who is constantly the object of adoring
crowds soon cant live without it and often unconsciously, begins to shape
his message to assure continual adulation.”
When ministry (noun) takes priority over minister (verb), servanthood is squeezed out.
Ministry of God does not mean my ministry; I cannot lay claims to its effectiveness or lack of….It belongs to God ultimately..
My identity should not be wrapped around my position as a leader.
Embracing one’s own failure and expendability is a major step of liberation away from the bondage of self-interest.
M Scott Peck
“The need for control – to ensure the desired outcome – is at least
partially rooted in the fear of control.”
- A true servant leader
… relinquishment of a prized position, leaving the security of a solid financial “power base”, or
voluntarily minimising one’s own importance so that someone else can have an opportunity
to rise to a place of prominence.
With nothing to prove and no vested interest, take joy in seeing others grow beyond himself.
Henri Nouwen
– The beginning and the end of Christian leadership is to give your life for
other.
Jesus Christ
“The Son of Man did not come to be served but to serve and to give His life as a ransom for many” (Matt 20:28)
The goal of a leader is to work himself out of a job.
A commitment to planned obsolescence may produce inferior automobiles, but it makes for
great servant leaders.
- Questions to think
Are we willing to embrace God’s will even when His will appear to hold a deterioration of our personal place of importance as a leader?
Is our identity so wrapped up in our leadership position that the loss of position causes us deep emotional trauma?
Can we make John the Baptist’s choice to decrease?
A new beginning .... A new call
Summary of past weeks learning.
I have been busy with planning for a camp, studying for my course and taking care of jo and children.
Jo has been unwell due to the wisdom tooth extraction. It is painful seeing her bearing the pain throughout the day. It has been more than 1 week and she is still nursing the pain. Sigh!
Study has been good in that my past 10 submissions for the reading assignment received distinctions. I have been very encouraged that I am moving in the right direction.
God blesses me with a pair of free tickets to London because of the frequent flyer card draw. Another person just sms me that God has spoken to her to bless us financially. Wow! More than the amount, the fact that God spoke to someone about us makes me feel very blessed indeed. God will always take care of His saints….
Lately, I have been reminded about the need to seek His perfect will for my life. John Bereve reminded us that God will hold us accountable to His will. And when we failed, He will raise someone else to fulfil it. In the 90’s, I was told that God called a church to move to Woodland. There was several intention and actions but nothing significant was done. Today, CEFE, Lighthouse and VFC are there. Has that church missed something in the process? I don’t know and I cannot judge ….. but it surely reminded me that I must raise up to do God’s call for Senglee. Otherwise, God will raise someone else to do my part.
This led me to pray and seek God for the past week.
Interestingly, God spoke to me last Sunday through Jn21.
He had called me to love Him by Feeding His Lambs, Taking care of His sheep, Feeding His sheep.
I was very touched cos this passage had been a constant reminder from God at different junctions of my life as a believer.
He has not changed His call in my life and that I have to leave my “boat” and follow Him as an expression of my love.
Yes, the leaving from my “spiritual family” had dealt a great blow in my life. Far deeper than I care to admit and know. I remembered how deeply I cried in one of the night whereby God ministered to me in my dream. In that dream, God drew me out to release my pain to Him. And I cried till I was awaken by the pain I felt. Yes I had been hurt and it was not easy to state that…
But now, I have released the pain to Him by His grace. I have been led to bless sincerely from my heart in another dream. Yes I am an old man now..hahah…”old man dreams dream, young man see vision…” In this other dream, I was led to see the pain in those who hurt me. I was shocked and saddened by what I saw. And I woke up blessing them sincerely from my heart.
After speaking to me through these Dreams, God then spoke to me through the scripture. He knew that as a ex-Navigator, I needed scripture to justify my action plan. In fact, I told God that it would be nice if He could give me another scripture to confirm His will for me. And HE DID through Jn21.
That settles it for me!
I will be a pastor for Him!
I have been busy with planning for a camp, studying for my course and taking care of jo and children.
Jo has been unwell due to the wisdom tooth extraction. It is painful seeing her bearing the pain throughout the day. It has been more than 1 week and she is still nursing the pain. Sigh!
Study has been good in that my past 10 submissions for the reading assignment received distinctions. I have been very encouraged that I am moving in the right direction.
God blesses me with a pair of free tickets to London because of the frequent flyer card draw. Another person just sms me that God has spoken to her to bless us financially. Wow! More than the amount, the fact that God spoke to someone about us makes me feel very blessed indeed. God will always take care of His saints….
Lately, I have been reminded about the need to seek His perfect will for my life. John Bereve reminded us that God will hold us accountable to His will. And when we failed, He will raise someone else to fulfil it. In the 90’s, I was told that God called a church to move to Woodland. There was several intention and actions but nothing significant was done. Today, CEFE, Lighthouse and VFC are there. Has that church missed something in the process? I don’t know and I cannot judge ….. but it surely reminded me that I must raise up to do God’s call for Senglee. Otherwise, God will raise someone else to do my part.
This led me to pray and seek God for the past week.
Interestingly, God spoke to me last Sunday through Jn21.
He had called me to love Him by Feeding His Lambs, Taking care of His sheep, Feeding His sheep.
I was very touched cos this passage had been a constant reminder from God at different junctions of my life as a believer.
He has not changed His call in my life and that I have to leave my “boat” and follow Him as an expression of my love.
Yes, the leaving from my “spiritual family” had dealt a great blow in my life. Far deeper than I care to admit and know. I remembered how deeply I cried in one of the night whereby God ministered to me in my dream. In that dream, God drew me out to release my pain to Him. And I cried till I was awaken by the pain I felt. Yes I had been hurt and it was not easy to state that…
But now, I have released the pain to Him by His grace. I have been led to bless sincerely from my heart in another dream. Yes I am an old man now..hahah…”old man dreams dream, young man see vision…” In this other dream, I was led to see the pain in those who hurt me. I was shocked and saddened by what I saw. And I woke up blessing them sincerely from my heart.
After speaking to me through these Dreams, God then spoke to me through the scripture. He knew that as a ex-Navigator, I needed scripture to justify my action plan. In fact, I told God that it would be nice if He could give me another scripture to confirm His will for me. And HE DID through Jn21.
That settles it for me!
I will be a pastor for Him!
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